You shall not be in dread of them; for the Lord your God is in the midst of you, a great and terrible God. Deuteronomy 7:21
Filled with dread is an understatement. My husband and I readied ourselves to drive to the hospital with our daughter and her husband for her brain surgery. Although I prayed incessantly for peace, hope in my heart and to have faith in God’s love and care, I could not seem to control the relentless fearful thoughts that overwhelmed me and seemed to consume me with dread. The heaviness I felt in my chest was suffocating. My daughter, true to her character, bravely smiled and gave me a hug, and then we put on our jackets. As her mother, my heart ached for her. As a nurse, I knew too much about what she faced during her surgery and in the difficult days of recuperation ahead. I was torn between fear and the hope that came from the knowledgeable physicians in whose hands she was. Although, I did believe she was in God’s hands, as were her doctors, the heaviness in my chest continued. Just as we were to head out the door, the telephone rang. It was our son. Our daughter-in-law had gone into labor with our first grandchild! I was overcome with emotion! Who would believe this? The anticipation of this joyful event mixed with the anxiety of our daughter’s extensive surgery was emotionally overwhelming, as my concerns and prayers turned toward our daughter-in-law too, and what the day held for her and our son.
The hours dragged by. Rosaries in hand, prayers said by so many who cared for our family, support where we never expected it, faithfulness and gratitude to God for each tiny step forward during that day, kept us focused and joined our hearts forever. We were carried on a cloud of prayer; prayers of family, friends and people who didn’t even know us. Slowly the dread within me lessened and was refocused as we were updated by medical personnel about our daughter, and phone calls from our son about our daughter-in-law. Slowly, hope was rekindled. Thirteen hours later, as our daughter’s medical team apprised us at the end of her surgery; we received the call from our son that our little granddaughter, Abigail Elaine, had just been born after a long and difficult day! With gratitude to God we heard that she and her Mother were both fine! What indescribable joy we felt! We now had a new addition to our family! We were Grandparents! And our daughter was now out of surgery and although on a fragile road to recovery, she had made it this far. Now she was on the road to healing - to a full and healthy life with her husband. Although she could not speak that night, as I held her hand and told her of the birth of her niece, I knew that God meant for these two lives to intertwine on this day – for always; that God was in their midst –in our midst through every moment. Knowing God’s presence was in these events – in all events of our lives - will be etched in my soul for eternity.
There is much to fear these days in many uncontrollable events, and there are many among us who are at the root of undo suffering, but God assures us that nothing is unnoticed by Him. Our God is a great and awesome God! He gives us so much more than we could ever ask for. How good He is!
When we are in dread of events or others, and it is difficult to see that You are in our midst, help us turn to You, our God!
Copyright© 2014 Kathleen A. Matson